Could Michael Jackson have been The Greatest Entertainer in the World if he had not been abused as a child, or if he did not have the strange idiosyncrasies?
His talent and discipline -- as a singer,
songwriter, dancer and showman -- are unmatched.
But where does the bizarre behavior fit in?
In Brief
I began with reading “how come” he used so much cosmetic surgery to change his appearance – looking more and more like a thin Elizabeth Taylor -- until it went too far.
From this starting point I developed the sequence of codes which have helped me understand more of what contributed to the following issues:
- His being driven to be an “over-the-top” entertainer
- Difficulty in sleeping – for which he probably used the Diprivan
- The extensive cosmetic surgery
- His being accused of child sexual abuse
Super-Super Star Status for Michael
The phrase “It is written” – meaning it is predestined – seems to apply for Michael Jackson’s success.
His talent and creativity for singing and showmanship showed up at an early age. His father’s own attempts with a singing group set the stage for him to recognize his sons’ talent and start pushing them towards success. We’ll never know if Michael would have gotten the breaks without his father’s push, but certainly Joe’s driving interest was essential for such an early start.
Michael’s sense of heaven was when he was on stage, playing to an audience who loved him. Off stage … he found it more difficult to please both his father and himself.
My sense of what drove him to be so “over-the-top” as a performer started when Michael was 38 months old when his brother Randy was born. These imprints were first triggered with his parents:
“I am nothing to them. I am misjudged as only a boy. It’s my fault that I’ve lost their loving attention -- I’m disgraced.”
These imprints are stuck in place with Hurt, Anger and Disgrace. To avoid the stuck emotion, Michael’s Survival Tactic was to be compliant – “not say what they don’t want.”
So, he drove himself to be where “I am something" - which was in front of an audience who loved him. And of course being successful was a way to get his parents to see that “I am NOT nothing.”
Despite his success, however, he was fighting the drumbeat of his own negative self-talk. Even when his father wasn’t around to beat him up, Michael “beat himself up” with constant devotion to craft, always working to “be something,” always reaching higher for performance satisfaction -- in order to be loved and needed by others. Nothing could be just normal. It had to be extraordinary.
For him to transform the Hardwired Unloving Belief of “I am nothing” would have required him to go INTO the stuck emotions of Hurt, Anger and Disgrace. But this process is not well known (yet), and the normal way to cope with life is to avoid such emotion.
It appears that Michael’s primary strategy to cope with life was to continue seeking his “heaven” of feeling wanted and needed. That was easy: performing for audiences who loved him, entertaining his friends and the children at Neverland, helping to support charitable causes, and probably even “helping” shopkeepers by buying extravagantly.
As is normal, however, the unloving imprints (HC React Codes) repeatedly showed up in his life in hurtful ways.
Difficulty in Sleeping
Using painkillers and other medications was part of how Michael ran his Survival Tactics to avoid the Hurt, Anger and Disgrace holding in the belief of “I am nothing.”
Dying unexpectedly was an OUTCOME of running the Survival Tactics.
He used medications as a Survival Tactic to avoid the stuck emotion. The outcome was that the medications overwhelmed his body -- and it let go.
His current difficulty in sleeping would not have been considered unusual, given the stress of preparing for this comeback. However, I think he was actually getting pumped up by anticipating the new audiences and having good rehearsals. He was ready and he was excited.
But – my sense is that he was triggered into his REAL stress of
“I’m nothing to them” by a couple of well-meaning critics
associated with the show.
His REAL stress came not from preparing for the performance, but from again being triggered into a feeling of “I’m nothing to them.” My sense is that this happened with a couple of well-meaning critics associated with the show.
- The first stress-trigger I sense was 9 days before his death, on a Sunday, June 14, probably with friends at home. This is when he may have started having more trouble sleeping, and finally resorted to using more medications by Wednesday, June 17.
- The second major stress-trigger I sense was on Saturday, June 20, at a rehearsal. This made him continue to need his sleep “support.”
The tragedy is that, even though he was certainly not trying to
orchestrate his death – and probably thought that his past success
using this system would continue – at some point the stressors
are just TOO MUCH, and the body succumbs.
While my readings on this are in no way confirmed by direct evidence, I do feel that Michael underestimated the stress his body was under and never thought that his demand to “help me sleep” would have such horrible consequences.
If he had transformed the imprint of “I am nothing,” the stress that caused the difficulty in sleeping would have been considerably reduced … and sleep would have been easier, without sleep aids.
Cosmetic Surgery – also over-the-top
We joke about women who have over-done facelifts. I wish Michael Jackson had seen himself as beautiful before it went so far.
My reading on him began with the question … “How was he successful in getting his nose to look like a caricature?” The answer I decoded was “He was running a Hardwired Unloving Belief, held in place by RAGE with his father’s father, when he was about 27 months old.”
Rage is a feeling of “I don’t like this and I can’t do anything about it.”
While Michael probably never met his grandfather, this generational imprint reveals the upset of grandfather not teaching his son to receive the innate value of Michael. Actually, my sense of the situation is that Michael’s Hardwire Unloving Belief is the following:
“I am not what father wants – he wants a woman, not another baby.”
So, his subconscious drivers were to be the woman that father wanted – so he could be loved and valued.
Because he had a close relationship with Elizabeth Taylor (another child star), it appears to me that he was influenced by her look.
I have no sense that he was trying to avoid looking like his father or trying to drop his African-American look.
He just wanted to be loved and needed … first by father, and then by his audiences.
Accusations of Child Sexual Abuse
Michael’s first troubles surfaced in 1993. He had developed his ranch Neverland as the great escape, a place where children could be happy and feel loved. And he wanted to be happy and feel loved, too – just as he did when he was performing on stage.
However, our society does not accept that a person over 30 who spends such attention on children does not have ulterior sexual motives. Plus, there are also people in our society who look for opportunities to “make money” where they can.
My sense is that Michael’s sexual development was stunted along with his lost childhood. We now know that his children are not from his sperm.
It is likely, in my view, that he truly loved the company of children for no reason other than delighting in their joy – hoping to recapture the joy that he missed in his own childhood. My sense is that he had NO sexual motives with the children who visited Neverland. While he certainly made inappropriate choices for a man of his age, he was not really a man of his age.
The 1993 accusation of sexual abuse resulted in a $20 million settlement. Later, the accuser and his family said it had been a scam. The 2005 trial on similar accusations resulted in Michael being acquitted on all charges.
So how come was he “successful” in being accused of wrong-doing?
I find that his experiences are consistent with running Hardwired Unloving Beliefs along the lines of:
- “I am misunderstood. He (at first father, then others) doesn’t understand me as someone who came into this life to love him.”
- “Because father (then others) says that life doesn’t honor and support him, he feels I don’t add to his life, just by being me.”
- "If he doesn’t feel support from life – how can I get support from life?”
Anger, Hurt and Hatred hold in these beliefs. Hatred is the feeling of “I have been hurt, and I want to hurt back!” Because Michael avoided his stuck emotion of Hatred – by trying to be loving and nice -- it came around and hurt him and others.
Beliefs that would be more loving include:
- I am a unique expression of life energy.”
- “I am willing to have people in my life who are responsible – responsible to themselves and in their commitments to me.”
- “I am wiling to be responsible to myself.”
- “I am willing to receive myself, to value myself, to honor myself as a unique expression of love, of life energy.”
Transformation does not result from trying to be nice or thinking loving thoughts or just meditating. Transformation requires that we actually see, intensely feel, and “melt off” the stuck emotion that is holding in our own unloving truths. Only then can we change these hardwired unloving beliefs that drive our reaction to life.
Transformation shifts the instinctive reaction and helps the new beliefs come true.
Michael Jackson did not have the guidance –or he rejected the guidance – for how to transform his unloving truths.
He did the best he could to cope with his “truths.” Not only was he an extraordinary talent and showman – the “Greatest Entertainer in the World” – he was a loving and generous individual.
But that was the Smile that hid his sad truths.
Further thoughts:
By bringing to light the hardwired codes that drive a person’s reactive nature, I hope to show that there is truly a NEW WAY OUT.
- Could Michael Jackson have been the great entertainer that he was if his father had not been abusive? My answer is YES. Joe Jackson produced a successful singing group with talented people through his focus, persistence and attention. I believe the abusive punishment was not necessary for their success.
- If he had transformed the stress-producing codes that haunted him, would he have become the super star?
It depends upon when he transformed them. If his drive to avoid “being nothing” had been resolved earlier, he might not have pushed himself up the ladder of greatness at such an early age.
His codes helped drive him to be successful.
Also, my sense is that he made several significant decisions early in life that he stuck with and that carried him to greatness:
- If I can’t please father … I’ll work to please my audience. They want and need me.
- I will be responsible to my audience. I will give them what they want.
- I’ll give my energy to those who want to receive it.
Once at the top, his talent, discipline and professionalism could have continued to carry him through. He could have stayed at the leading edge simply for joy of it … not as a way to avoid the pain.
My sense is that if he had transformed these codes in the 1990’s, he would have kept the pleasure of an appreciative audience while making fewer bizarre choices. In his philanthropy, he might have actually brought more sustainable joy and love to children through his example of transformation.
Teach a man to fish …
Read further for the True Energy readings on Michael’s relationships.
